Posts Tagged ‘presuppositions’

Here’s a simple NLP technique that you can use covertly to get someone to agree with you on a certain point. You can use this trick when negotiating a pay rise, selling a product in person or anytime you’re trying to work people over to your side of the fence. All it requires is using a technique known as anchoring.

Before you reach the moment/question/sales pitch where you want to get the other person to agree with you, you must first lay some groundwork. Ask your target a few yes or no questions. This isn’t a yes set where you want the person to only answer yes. You actually want a mixture of both yes and no answers.

Whenever they answer a question with a yes, flash them a sincere smile (this may take some practice in the mirror) and tie this in with a certain gesture. This can be any gesture you choose, but make sure it’s simple and subtle. For example when you smile you might touch your chin with your index finger. When they answer no stay pretty stony faced and tie this in with another separate gesture that can’t be mistook for the first, If you use the example I gave above for yes, then you could blink and leave your eyes closed for a second longer than you would normally.

Now that you have anchored a positive and negative reaction you have set up your target. This is when it’s time to strike. When you ask the BIG question wherever it’s “Will you give me a raise?” or “Would you like to meet up next Saturday?” you then use the gesture that you used whenever they answered yes. This will resonate in their subconscious mind, and without even consciously thinking about it, nine times out of ten they will agree.

It doesn’t really take much practice to do. You might want to practice your gestures in the mirror to make sure they look natural but that’s about it.

And that’s how to get someone to agree with you.

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Presuppositions are considered to be one of the most powerful language patterns within NLP. The idea is to presuppose an outcome as if it is guaranteed to happen. When used correctly the person you are talking to will make the connection that this outcome is bound to happen. For example if you are meeting with a new client to discuss a contract you might use the line “Before we finalize the contract, would you like something to drink?”. It sounds like you are giving your client a choice, but in reality the choices having nothing to do with each other. You are steering them towards what you want to happen.

Here you can see that the fact that finalizing the contract has been presupposed within a question about having something to drink. The desired outcome has been presupposed. You can use such presuppositions to control the flow and tempo of the conversation so that you always end up presupposing the outcome you want. Before long these frequent presuppositions and suggestions will stick to your target’s subconscious mind and the outcome won’t be in the question at all. It will be as if you both wanted the same thing from the very get go.

There a few different ways to use presuppositions to get what you want.

Ors

Or presuppositions gives the illusion of choice but have the intention of one definite outcome. There is often an “or” in many other presuppositions too.

“Should we go out for a drink or go to a restaurant instead?”

Here you are presupposing that you are definitely going out. The only question is where.

Numeric Indicators

Numeric indicators use words such as first, second, third, etc to indicate order.

“Do you want to go to X first or Y?”

Here you’ve given someone two choices of where to go yet they could easily be two places you want to go anyway.

Time Based

Time bases presuppositions use words such as now, then, after, when, prior etc to presuppose a time of action.

“Would you like my phone number now or when we leave the club?”

This is an effective presupposition because now only are you assuming that they want your number but you will be leaving the club together. An excellent presupposition for seduction purposes.

Twisting Time

Much like time based presuppositions except less obvious. Common words used include start, stop, begin, end, continue, already, etc.

“Do you want to continue this here, or go elsewhere to finish it off?

This presupposes that the person wants to continue whatever discussion is going on.

There are a few other methods of slipping in presuppositions into conversation but the four ways above are the main ways, and all you need to know to start using them to get what you want.

Some people use presuppositions without even realizing it so they probably don’t quite understand why others seem to do what they want more often than not. However you now know what presuppositions are and how to use them. This means that you can pattern your use of them direct people towards the specific outcome you want. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how useful this can be.

I hope you have enjoyed this article and begin using presuppositions to get what you want. Your powers of persuasion will increase dramatically for it.

Doug Slater.

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